I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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