For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Panties = found
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
