I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
