theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
