i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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