remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Randomize
