normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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