rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
