You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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