I'm lost and stupid without you.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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