we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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