i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
you made out with another girl for some wings
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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