I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
