grandma shit on top of the toilet
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I think people are normalizing furries
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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