That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
