3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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