This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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