does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
