My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
