I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
