no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
