i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
