She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
