So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
