Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
