I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
