All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Randomize
