yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
