big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
