So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
