i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
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