I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Randomize
