from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
