The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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