can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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