walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
