I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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