Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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