a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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