I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
