ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
My bed smells like the plague
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
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