google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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