woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
