i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
and you fell through a lawn chair
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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