I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
