come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
