even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
