i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
as a side note pls kill me
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
