Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
