Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i barfeds in our rink
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize